What about me blogging again in less than a week.
Call it age, maturity or not being as self centered as I once was, but I am so thankful for all three of those. Aging is not for sissy's that is for sure. But wow I hope we all become softer, more forgiving and for once in our lives look beyond the outside of some ones appearance. I just realized recently how I have misjudged someone (good or bad) by the way they look on the outside. Like there is this person whom I have known for a really long time and on the outside they have it all together and if I am being honest there was times in life that I was jealous or at least envious. It wasn't like a really close friend but I thought there is no limit to what she wants and whatever she wants she gets. Fast forward to many years later where I see now what she always wanted, money could not buy. Things could not sustain and looks on the outside does not always reflect what they are trying to achieve on the inside. Please don't try to figure out who I am talking about because that is not the point. At some stage in our life I am sure I could be talking about anyone, including myself! I can't say for me it has been a lifelong struggle but I can say that I have said to myself, "if only I had this or if only I had that" I would be happy and satisfied. Only to see in a very short time that I was chasing acceptance. Sometime it was acceptance from others and sometimes it was acceptance from ME! If I was thinner, if I was richer, if I was prettier, if I was smarter and the list goes on. I know I have said everyone of these things to myself. If I was all I wanted to be well frankly I would be someone else! Being someone else does not solve the problem, it just gives us a new set of problems. Back to the person I was Jealous or maybe even envious of, I am thankful that age or maturity has changed me, because now instead of wanting to be her, I want her to see herself the way others see her. I want whatever has made her feel unworthy to be cast into the sea of forgetfulness. I believe she is woreout from chasing whatever has been lacking in her life. I want more then that for her to see herself the way God sees her. I wish I could just take credit for being a good person but it has been a work in progress. I could have done better going through my adult life but I guess as momma would say that is water under the bridge. I pray that I am better at getting to know someone for who they are on the inside and not who they are on the outside. Sometimes I think it is like trying to fill a dark hole from the abyss. No amount of money, stuff, compliments, or looks can fill that hole. But there is one that can fill that hole with light and his name is Jesus. I can honestly say that today because I have that hole and if I keep the light in there it is never completely overtaken by darkness. I hope you know that chances are that if I know you I have prayed for you sometime. If I have not, I am sure that I will. If I have not prayed for you by name, I have prayed for many situations and conditions. I do love to pray for others, so if you trust me with your prayers, please shoot me a private message and I will happy to pray for you. If you would like to share what you want me to pray about that will be fine but if you just want me to pray without knowing details, that is great to. I know that God knows your needs and that is sufficient. I hope that when you and I see people we are not so shallow that we only see what is on the outside. I pray that you see the beauty in you and not the ashes. It is a great thing to pray for others but don't forget to pray for yourself. God love you just as much as He does the next guy!
