Friday, August 14, 2015

Identity of who I am

I have blogged before a little on identity but it has really just been on my radar lately and it seems that God keeps bringing it to me in a lot of different ways over the past years. I believe my first identity crisis that was the most impacting was when Ej passed away. I remember thinking I have always been Ej's mom but now who am I.  It took many conversation with God to understand that I was Ej's mom and I am still Ej's mom. Of course I still felt like mom because I had Tiffany here with me, so she helped me hang on to my identity as mom.  But as I looked around me I began to understand the importance of our being by our identity.  Outside my bubble as I went to give my testimony at the jail and I sat behind the girls that was incarcerated, I could not help but see the really big INMATE sign on their back.  I was sad because I thought God, please don't let that identity stick to them because there is such freedom in know your identity.  Then last Sunday, a friend of Ej's  (Henry Cardwell) had just returned from a mission trip in Thailand and he spoke of many different things. The one thing that stuck in my head and in my heart was when he was talking about children that was born at home and some of them did not have a birth certificate. And even now that can't afford to get one.  Without the birth certificate the children could not attend school. Without the birth certificate it was like that don't exist. Wow, that was crushing for me. God and I have had lots of conversation about identity. I am so thankful that we are able to have a identity in Christ, no matter if we have a piece of paper to say who we are.  But that is easy for me to say because I have that birth certificate and I have been able to attend school, get married, travel to another country and have a career to make a living here on earth. And even though I know God has for some reason allowed me to have this, I am sure if I went to get my passport and I was to say well my identity is in Christ so issue me a passport without a birth certificate, chances are I would have been turned down.  So I don't know how this is going to happen but if God has gave me this task, I know it will happen.  I am excited to talk to Mike and Sherry (our Thailand missionaries) to find out how much it cost for these babies to get a birth certificate and if it is even human possible to get one.  If it is not humanly possible, I know it is God possible.  I am on a mission because identity has to start somewhere, so stay tuned and see what happens!