Wednesday, July 13, 2016

Water, Life and God....
Tomorrow is Ej's birthday and it happens to fall on Thursday which is the day he was born.
First of all I cannot believe it has been so long since I blogged. Time marches on...I think this time of year is such a roller coaster for me. It starts around mothers day and travels through May and June and then hitting that dreaded day of July 2. Only to be followed by those 12 days on each side of the dash. Ej Glenn July 14, 1983 - July 2, 2006. 
For some reason this year I have thought a lot about the ocean and how it is so much like my life during this time. It is like visiting the ocean and I am anxious because I am getting ready to go on a journey. You know you are going on a journey and you hope and pray for nice weather. I look at life and I am in awe. I look at the ocean and I am in awe. When I first take the first few steps into the ocean, I am unsure of what is to come.  Is the waves going to be crashing me to the shore or will I be in calm water. Will the current carry me out and that is okay except I don't want to go to far out. If I go to far out, I may not be able to get back to shore, where I feel safe and secure. Then you see that sunrise and I am in awe again. I notice out in the distance that storm clouds are forming and it looks like the weather may get a little rough. Do I wait until the last minute to take cover or do I take the safe way and go for cover. Then bam there is the storm that has been picking up and stirring. The storm comes and I take cover and hope for ocean to calm. Hope for the sun to shine and wait to see the peaceful water with the sun setting. It really is all those emotions that carry me through this time.
It is not surprising that Jesus says that he is living water. That even though we do not know what the future holds, I know who holds my future. My emotions like the ocean are all over the place, but like the storms and the calm, nothing surprises God. I have to remind myself that God is the calm after the storm. God is the sun after the rain. Trust me I struggle and I have those days where I know I only survive by the grace of God.  I want to encourage and a lot of days I think I barely keep my head above water and especially this time of year. But I will keep my eyes above the waves. When someone says I encourage that always makes me smile because that is what God has called me to do. God knows this time of year he has to hold hand a little tighter. He has to throw me the life line a little more often. He shows me and teaches me about how the ocean and life is so connected but more than all of that he shows me that his love is unconditional and when I fail he still loves me. He loves me and allows me to be broken. But he always calls me back into reality after July 14th. He allows me to stand in the storm, he allows me to be taken out with the current and even allows me to try to keep my head above the waves on my own and then he reaches down and pulls me back to shore. Back to where I feel safe and secure. But he always reminds me that a storm can be brewing and I need to be steadfast with him. Ten years and Jack and I are still standing.  HAPPY BIRTHDAY MY SWEET EJ. I LOVE YOU ALWAYS.....
The anchor holds
though the ship is battered
The anchor holds
though the sails are torn