long time no post....

Well it has been a long time since I last post..where does time go?  It has been a blur since May.  We have been so blessed to have visits from family and friends, so I guess that is why time has flew by.  We got to have a celebration of life for Ej in July. It did mine, Jack's  heart good to have such a great turn out.  Ej would be thirty years old and I know that he is in the presence of God... I know that I could of not survive if I did not know God. That is what gets me through this life, this month, this week, this day, this hour, this minute. Our friend Brad Bulla lost his son August 3, 2005 and today I read about one of Brad,s friends (who also lost his daughter) anyway Brad posted how he and his friend encouraged one another along the way..it made me think of the many friends that I have had to encourage me, Jack, and tiffany along our way. God always provides for us even when tears are clouding our eye's.  So thankful that Brad 's post reminded me of the blessings of friends. God even puts people in our path that have experienced the same grief that we have. I love all our friends and I have such a special bond with those that understand my heart.  My prayer is that we always can be a friend to others. I hope that Jack and I can encourage others like we have been encouraged. Thanks Brad and Tracy, we will never forget Christmas eve in the potting shed, crying, laughing and remembering Jed and Ej! Thanks for our own little music venue..

mothers past present and future

As I reflect on mother's day...I cry, I smile and I am in awe of what God's plan is.  It always was about my mom, even when I had children...mother's day wasn't about me. I could only hope that I was even half the mom that my mom was. God blessed me with Tiffany and Ej..and I am so thankful for what he has given me..not only did I get tiff and ej but I also got two beautiful grandsons...now I watch my daughter who us now the mom. She is an amazing mother. She had wonderful role models in my mom and in my grandmother's..I believe God made women to be the toughest mom and the most compassionate mom all in one.  So many women have influence my life in so many ways and for that I am thankful...Thanks mom, granny, grandma Lockhart, aunt Loretta, aunt Shirley, and my beautiful daughter Tiffany and my other daughter (who isn't our daughter by blood but our daughter by love) kristi....you all mean the world to me...

I am Ej & Tiffany's mom

As I was thinking about God this morning and how we as in the flesh, because we don't see with our physical eyes. We have a hard time believing. We do not physically see our God (yet) but that does not make him any less our God. We have to see God in things around us..For me I see him most when I am outdoors, especially at night in the stars and the moon.
So my best analogue of this is I am Tiffany's mom. You can physically see that. Because she is here and you can see her with eyes. (and you know from the way she acts sometimes, she is mine...lol) Then there is Ej, who is not physically here but I am still his mom. We don't physically see Ej anymore. But I see Ej with my faith eyes. I see Ej in dreams and vision (that by the way is nothing to do with me or Ej) but has everything to do with what God gives us. I cannot see Ej with my natural eyes but he is still my son, and I am still his mother. I cannot see God with my natural eyes but he is still my father and I am still his daughter. When we understand how much our faith eyes impact our lives, it will shows us things that our natural eyes cannot see. Some of you know Tiffany and Ej and it is easy to believe that both are my children, but for those who have never met Ej, how do you really know that he is mine. You know that by faith. Yes, you see evidence in pictures of Ej with us and you know by what others have said that I do have a son (a very real son) that I am his mom. You have seen Tiffany and still can see Tiffany and I am her mom. But we have that same evidence of God in the bible. We see that same evidence when we see the creation that has given to us. You have seen miracles and wonders, and if you did not recognize the miracles and wonders does that mean they don't exist. I am thankful for the faith that is beyond my understanding that God has blessed me with. But you have to know that faith is for everyone. You can have that same faith by seeking God, by reading his word, by stepping out of the boat. How are you ever going to know if you can walk on water if you never step out of the boat..I am Tiffany and Ej's mom, I am God's daughter and God is my father. That is just the facts. May God show you something amazing today..Let me rephrase that. May you SEE the amazing things that God is going to show you today...Peace, love and blessings