Tonight my thoughts are with my really good friend Donna. You know you have friends that you grow up with, you have friends that you connect with through work or play. Friends for a life time or friends for season. I am thankful that I have all those kinds of friends but I have a friend who is my person. You know the one that is more than a friend, a person that you have connection with because both of you had a child in 1983, but did not meet until after 2006. One that has a child that reminds me of someone that would be a lot like Ej, but only the child is a female child. A beautiful blonde hair, blue eyed, and gorgeous smile that could light up a room. A beautiful girl that left this earthly home 11 years ago today at the young age of 21 years 4 months and 19 days. I met Donna not long after we lost Ej. Amanda was born just two months after Ej. I have had the blessing of getting to know all about Amanda through her momma's eyes and her momma's heart. Donna has got to know Ej through the eyes and heart of this momma. We have laughed, we have cried, we have talked and we have sat in silence but we are connected. She is my person. We are amazed how much Ej and Amanda had the same likes and how we think they are traveling comet's and galaxies and moon and star hopping. How they get to see heavenly things. How they have praised God and how they are whole. But today 11 years ago, Amanda left here. You know the thing about having a person is that you are connected and their happiness becomes yours, and their sadness becomes yours. Even when something is not quiet right in your soul and come to find out it is because your person is struggling. This morning on my way back from Somerset the sun was shining. There is something about the sunshine that makes my soul lighter. That was not always the case, I remember after Ej passed away everyday I would wake up and say to God, how can the sun still be shining. How can this world still be turning. Will I ever really feel the heat of the sun on my face. I longed for that for a really long time. It took me a really long time to feel the warmth of the sun again. Well anyway on my way back from Somerset, I felt the warmth of the sun on my face and I immediately thought of Amanda and I thanked God for Amanda and I felt like God was showing me that he had Amanda and Ej. That he was reminding me who he is. Amanda was our gift here on earth just like the sun is our gift on earth. Even though we don't always see the sun, the sun is still here, it is still shining. Even though Amanda is not here, she is still here. She still lights up here momma heart, she still is her momma's light. Amanda I hope you are seeing all that you longed to see. You are beautiful and you are loved.
I believe in the sun, even when it isn't shining
I believe in Love, even when I don't feel it
And I believe in God, even when he is silent.
